The BIGGEST POSITIVE UPDATE since my diagnosis over 10 years ago!!
So please give it a read….
I’ve always struggled with events, networking, and important commitments with family or work, but I was able to still be part of most of them, although I knew I’d be drained after.
Holidays abroad, music concerts, football games, exhibitions, travelling to London etc, I knew it would drain me for the day, but I still did them.
But in 2017, my anxiety was the worst it’s ever been, this was the year I was diagnosed with GAD (generalised anxiety disorder), and I was struggling a lot, even just visiting family, never mind anything more.
Since this moment, any of the things I could do before felt impossible, and I haven’t done any of them since.
After years of therapy, medication and learning about myself, my mental health, my triggers, my coping mechanisms etc, I’ve slowly been putting myself through exposure therapy.
With MHFC, I’ve been going to events, networking events, meeting new people, and slowly pushing myself.
This is to not only help MHFC, but it’s just as much, if not more, to improve my mental health and push my anxiety.
This brings me onto this month, January 2026, I’ve been invited to a lot of events and opportunities, most I would’ve turned down in the past, not just because they’re fairly big for me, but also because of the duration of them, and some being the same day or the day after each other.
In the past, there were several factors stopping me from saying yes to an event, opportunity or commitment….
– The duration of the event, anything more than 2 hours, I would really struggle with
– Not knowing the people attending, or who’s going
– Eating in public
– Two commitments in one day
– Or one big commitment one day and another the day after
– Having a big commitment later on, on a school night
– Multiple events and commitments on consecutive days
This month massively tested all the above….
3rd – MHFC SESSION
5th – MHFC SESSION
7th – VIDEO CALL MEETING – Andy from Get Doncaster Moving
Discussing MHFC
10th (AM) – MHFC SESSION
10th (PM) – KIDS PARTY
Usually I wouldn’t have gone to football as sometimes it stresses me and means I wouldn’t go to the party, especially when kids’ parties can be very much sensory overload for me.
13th – EXEC BOX WITH MHFC VOLUNTEERS
This was 5pm till 9:30pm on a school night, I knew this would stress me, as I was the host, I knew that it being at night would give no time to calm before sleep, which gives a tension headache, and I was taking my daughter to school the next day.
TENSION HEADACHE – I did wake up with a tension headache on the 14th, BUT I managed to calm myself, take my daughter to school and reduce the headache.
Quite happy with this result.
15th – IN PERSON MEETING – Clynton
Discussing the charity sector, networking, MHFC and the future.
17th – FAMILY PARTY
It was my Nana’s party, and this was important to me as all my family was attending, all cousins, aunties, uncles etc, it’s been years since we’ve all been together, so I felt slight pressure in making sure I was there
18th (AM) – NEW MHFC WEEKLY SESSION LAUNCH
We launched our brand new MHFC Lakeside session, this is slightly stressful when it’s new, and you hope everything goes smoothly, plus I was hoping I felt ok after the family gathering the night before
18th (PM) – 11ASIDE FRIENDLY
Played an 11aside friendly game after dinner, after the family gathering and launching the new session, I was quite surprised but happy that I felt ok to attend the game.
19th (PM) – DONNYFEST LAUNCH EVENT
After a busy weekend, I then went to the stadium again as I was attending the DonnyFest launch event. I was a little anxious, but thankfully I spotted people outside that I knew and I walked in with them, I’m glad I did as it was very busy and loud.
It was one event I got quite a lot from, as it was very relaxed, alcohol was being served, and it was after the work day so it was a lot more chilled, and I enjoyed it.
19th (NIGHT) – MHFC SESSION
I had to leave the venue early because I was taking part and running the Monday night MHFC session, it was very hectic, but it was good, and I felt ok.
20th (FIRST THING) – ACTIVE FUSION NETWORKING EVENT
This was the event that I quite liked to go to, but after the previous night of the event and football, I thought I’d be drained with a headache and not able to attend.
I felt ok though and managed to go, I didn’t realise what the event was, and it was more anxiety triggering than I thought with games.
It was good though, and I was happy to complete the crazy 4 days.
23rd – IN PERSON MEETING – Sally Jameson
I’ve met Sally a couple of times before this, and so I wasn’t anxious about this, but it was in a new location.
24th – EXEC BOX MHFC EXPERIENCE
Hosting 9 people in an exec box for an MHFC experience, this drained me a lot, and when I got home, I was really worried about my head, but after spending time with family, my head thankfully cleared.
25th (AM) – MHFC SESSION
I was at the MHFC session, I felt ok after the draining previous day and managed to attend the session.
25th (PM) – GUEST AT DONS RUGBY CUP GAME IN EXEC BOX & DINNER IN DIRECTORS LOUNGE
I had been invited to an exec box to watch rugby, and I was very anxious about letting the organisers down because I knew about the busy couple of days, but thankfully, they reassured me.
I was very anxious for the first 30mins but thankfully calmed and enjoyed myself.
I also didn’t know who was attending other than 3 out of 20 people, which I was anxious about.
At first, I felt anxious about being in and eating in the Directors’ lounge, however, the people I was with soon calmed me as we were having a chat and a laugh.
26th – MHFC SESSION
Felt a little drained, but ok to go to football as it was just 2mins from my house
27th – TENSION HEADACHE
I did wake up with a tension headache, but I think it was more that I couldn’t warm myself up after football and I didn’t hydrate myself enough.
But again, I managed to calm myself enough to take my daughter to school, and then the headache went through the day.
29th – PRE-BUSINESS SHOWCASE NETWORKING EVENT
I didn’t quite realise how busy this event would be, and I’m so glad I’ve built up more connections, friends and confidence.
If I’d have done this event 6-12 months ago, I’d have really struggled because of the number of people and unfamiliar faces, as well as it being over 3 hours, now though with more confidence and knowing more people, I’m more relaxed and get a lot more from the event.
I did come away with brain drain (the most out of any event listed in this post, purely down to the number of people there), however it would’ve been far worse 6-12 months ago.
30th (AM) – IN PERSON MEETING – Hannah
I woke up still a little tired and drained from the big event the day before.
Even though I felt this way, I still wanted to go to the meeting, and I’m so glad I did, it was such a powerful, thought provoking and at times deep chat, that went on for nearly 2 hours (even though it didn’t feel that long)!!
I’d never met Hannah before, but it was a great chat and definitely discussing mental health, as well as future ideas 💡
30th (PM) – KIDS PARTY
This was a very hectic party, a lot of kids, in a small room, with loud music, and after a draining few days, my head definitely felt it.
But I still managed it and without taking any tablets, 6-12 months ago, with the last few days, I may have backed out of going to the kids’ party, knowing I find them stressful.
31st – MHFC SESSION + TENSION HEADACHE
Unfortunately, I woke up with a tension headache, thankfully though it eased enough for me to feel ok to attend the MHFC session.
It would’ve been caused by the last couple of days being draining and stressful, and certainly with the kids party leaving me wired and not relaxed before bed.
The tension headache got increasingly worse as the day went on and was very close to turning into a migraine, but thankfully it calmed late in the night, I woke up the next day with a big headache hangover.
It’s a shame it happened on the last day of the month, as it’s put a slight dampener on what was a very good and positive month, I do tend to focus on negatives over the positives.
To some, it probably won’t seem much, but to me, the above is a lot, even when I was able to do more things, this would’ve been a lot.
Especially those two weekends of 17th, 18th, 19th and 20th, as well as the 24th and 25th.
I would never have accepted or booked to attend all those events, but to say I did and I stayed till the end with them all and enjoyed them, and even more that I felt ok after and the day after.
Yes, I’m doing the above to try and help MHFC and bring in more support, but it’s also massively for myself and my anxiety, I try to push myself.
And it’s certainly working, it’s done my mental health more good than MHFC so far, and I’m fairly happy with that as it’s a huge positive impact.
The number of supportive people that I’ve met and that have turned into good supportive friends is fantastic.
Those supportive people are now wanting me to do well, happy to see the progression, be part of it and even invite me to more things so I can continue to push and improve.
I used to walk into events or networking not knowing any faces, but now I walk in and see many familiar and supportive faces.
Each one I attend now, I usually come away with 1 or 2 more connections, which is great and just makes future events easier and hopefully better for MHFC as well as my mental health.
It’s been brilliant to meet so many new people over the last month.
This is them having a positive impact on my family life and giving me the best chance of going on holiday abroad for the first time in over 10 years and for the first time with my daughter.
I was meant to go abroad with them two years ago, but due to anxiety, I had to back out and then go without me, it was so tough, but I feel I’m in a better place now and all being well, I’ll be there with them this time.
I’m wanting big things for both me and MHFC, I want to be able to do a lot more stuff with my family and almost repay what I couldn’t do when I was struggling.
And with MHFC, I want it to grow and help all demographics in Doncaster and throughout the UK, and also keep organising MHFC Experiences and MHFC Surprises for those who deserve and need it.
One of my next goals for me personally and for me with MHFC is to be able to attend/visit events and other commitments that are further away from home, it will be a struggle, but I want to try my best to improve and conquer it for me, my family and MHFC.
A big thank you also to my Wife for, enabling and supporting me this month while I’ve been pushing to do all these events and commitments.
I’m also doing my best to reduce the amount of headache tablets I’m taking, and I’m happy to say that even though I’m doing a lot more, I’m taking a lot fewer tablets, instead, I’m doing my best to calm myself and relieve headaches that way.
The frustrating thing with mental health is that it does take time, a lot of time, to feel like you’re improving, even a little, and I’m very impatient when it comes to myself, this moment has taken 10 years to happen.
If you’re struggling, PLEASE be patient with yourself and make sure you have the right supportive people around you, it will help so much and make progress smoother and a little quicker.
There will be bumps in the road, and if you know someone’s struggling, PLEASE be there for them and supportive.
If you’ve read the post and I’ve been with you at an event or meeting and we’ve had a chat and a laugh, then I do appreciate it very much.
Thank you to everyone who’s supported me and helped with my anxiety.
I don’t want to specifically tag anyone as I’ll miss someone out who’s helped in some way, and I don’t want to do that.
You can see several photos from this month in the post.
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IMPROVING MENTAL HEALTH THROUGH FOOTBALL ⚽️💚
EVERYONE WELCOMED & SUPPORTED
#MHFC #MentalHealthFC #MentalHealthMatters
